By Jimmy G
Ok what does that even mean? Well, I think that we as people are capable of being a mirror of how we’re treated. If we are doubted we can doubt ourselves, if we are praised we can show confidence or even arrogance. If we are abused we can become abusers, if we are loved we can become lovers.
However, I also think that we can become something that creates a reflection. We can choose to show people who are negative the positives, we can choose to show people who hate how to love, we can choose to show strength to people who are feeling weak.
It’s not easy and it breaks a cycle of behavior that is taught to us over the early years of our lives.
I feel like I get caught up in the “reflection” roll too much. I don’t know about you but I feel like I’m constantly surrounded by negatives. Negative situations because of my choices or circumstance, negative people of whom some are that way because they’re just beaten down by life (I totally get it) but also some that seem to thrive and get energy from negativity.
I can get caught up in it too. Man it’s so easy to just complain, or find fault, or nitpick life. It can even make you feel like you’re gaining power over it sometimes to rant or complain because you’re “getting it out” or even getting attention from it. Sometimes it’s just so funny or such a good outlet that it almost becomes addicting.
Some people are pretty great ranters. Some make a living at it. But what are you adding to the lives of the people you’re ranting to? Even if I make you laugh or you agree with me about how bad something sucks, am I actually fixing or helping you fix anything? Sure we’re not alone but if we’re both drowning and all I do is let you know you’re not drowning alone, we both still drown.
Maybe that’s what some people need, just to know you’re not drowning alone. I don’t know but I think I want one of us to know how to swim and share the good news. Maybe that’s a bad example but it’s the one I thought of and it’s 4 am so that’s what you’re gonna get.
I guess my point is, if you’re looking for what sucks then you’re gonna find what sucks. If instead you look for what you like then you start seeing what you like and life becomes more about the cool journey. Yes your commute sucks but maybe your job is cool, or you have someone at work you enjoy seeing, or the job sucks but because of it you can do something that you love or take care of someone that you love. Maybe it’s just the day of the week that you get to go out, or stay in, or see a concert, or play video games for hours or whatever. Everything you do helps you get to the cool parts. And there’s always cool parts.
Tonight was St Pattys day and I work in a bar. If I focus on every difficult person, problem with the working environment, or negative aspect of the night then my night was trash. If I look for the moments of cool then I spent the night talking to friends, meeting new people, some of whom were very fun and entertaining. Working with people I genuinely like and enjoy, listening to good musicians perform what they work very hard on, having a few drinks and making money so I can pay my rent in the place that I live with the most awesome girl and our dog who is just literally the best and have the money and time to work on my passions like music and this podcast.
I was told tonight by some friends (who I really appreciate) that I was like a comet or force of nature that came into their lives and made them see what they were capable of and gave them confidence.
They said I saw inside their brain and helped them organize their thoughts.
That is the most amazing compliment I could ever receive. I honestly don’t know that I did any of that but I think that if I did, then it was because I was choosing to reflect the good and thoughtful and best parts of them that they were showing me back to them instead of dwelling in their “or my” hurt or pain or insecurities.
I don’t want to be a reflection of your pain. And I don’t want you to reflect mine. I want us to see each other and take whatever fear is being put out and reflect the confidence that pushes past it. I want us to take the pain and insecurities that we’re showing each other and reflect back the will, creativity and determination to overcome them.
I want to try to show and be the best of us so that you can see that you already are the best of us.
Silly rantings of a drunken empath at 4am? Maybe.
I’m not always positive, I’m really good at ranting, I love being funny and entertaining and sometimes that leads me to point out the negatives or make fun of a situation. I love shit talk, practical jokes, and sarcasm.
I’m not even close to approaching perfect, nor would I want to be.
I think there’s a difference and I think there’s a line. I know I cross it all the time but I want to do better. I want to see better, I want people to see that the negatives don’t go away but they’re way less heavy when you start to pay attention to all the cool shit that's also there. I want to be a reflector of that. Ok it’s 5 am and I’m still in my car sitting in front of my place. My dog is gonna be psyched when I walk in and my bed vibrates. I’m gonna go take in those positives.